Monday, October 21, 2013
Sunday, March 25, 2012
Malloch closes out tournament in style
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| Malloch and Jago were dressed by the same fashion outlet for round 4 |
He didn’t.
Malloch completed a clean sweep of the inaugural championship series with another dominant performance on Saturday. This time the location was the picturesque Bowral Country Club.
Away from the over-priced hustle and bustle of Sydney golf courses, Malloch unleashed a blistering display of golfing accuracy to win with 6.5 points.
Anthony Sandrejko finished 2nd, to lock up second place in the championship, with 5 points. Tom Hann came in third with 4.5, and Rod Jago returned to the familiar role of last place with an unimpressive 4.
“It was a magical location, magical atmosphere and a magical event,” said Malloch.
“I was able to play consistently throughout the day and managed to convert most of my opportunities. Once again, the other boys had nothing.”
A crisp Autumn chill greeted players as they rolled into Bowral and it was Malloch who got on the front foot early with a solid par to open the day’s proceedings.
Hole 2 added some spice to the affair though with Tom Hann producing one of the greatest shots in the history of golf.
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| Hann was under an injury cloud for much of the day |
Hann completed the birdie opportunity to receive 2 points and hit the lead.
Sadly for Hann, celebration quickly turned to despair and it would be another eight holes before he would trouble the scorers. He was also bothered by a troublesome groin injury which flared up after a viciously mis-timed stroke.
“After the birdie I started with the trash talk which I think was my undoing,” said Hann speaking with reporters after the round.
"I tried hard but I just wasn’t good enough… again. It didn’t help that Jago nearly killed me."
Indeed, commentators linked the collapse of Hann’s game to a violent incident that took place on course.
On hole seven, Jago was attempting his fourth shot which he sprayed way right. The shot also was on a clear trajectory towards Hann’s head.
“I just got the hell out of the way. I dropped my clubs, and my confidence just disappeared. If I see him again, he’s dead,” warned Hann.
Hann’s press conference was cut short after girlfriend Alexandra Loftus appeared and whisked him away in a Peugeot family transport vehicle. Sources close to the Hann camp believe she was upset after gloating to her friends about Hann’s golfing talent.
However, Hann chose to unleash revenge on the course towards the wrong opponent. On the 16th par three, Hann hit an approach shot that was both far too long and aimed directly at Malloch’s head.
Malloch ducked and covered at the last moment narrowly avoiding a Titleist buried in his head. The shot careened into the nearby housing estate and Malloch saw several lives flash before his eyes before eventually settling in to complete his par putt.
“Hann’s a loose cannon,” said Malloch. “Typical dirty tactics – he couldn’t win on skill so he resorted to dirty underhand tactics like trying to take out the opposition. Shameful stuff.”
For Jago it was another case of ‘what might have been’. After winning hole three and looking menacing on hole four, Jago once again self-destructed with a series of wayward drives, missed putts, ill-advised chips and a bad attitude to life in general.
“Get away from me!” yelled Jago to a throng of fans who had gathered to watch him putt on the 17th.
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| Hann putting for birdie in a rare moment of success |
Jago now faces the three week autumn break with much to ponder. After starting with such promise, he has been mired in mediocrity and left searching for answers.
Despite the self-combustion of Hann and Jago, Sandrejko once again proved to be an unorthodox force to be reckoned with. His style is a mixture of drunken stupor and powerful brilliance.
A prime example of this was hole two where he blasted his drive 310m to within 30m of the green, but was unable to convert and ended up with a triple bogey.
With the first staging of the tournament over, Malloch plans to get some much deserved R and R. However, he expects to face some tougher opposition when play resumes in late April for the second tournament.
“I’m sure those three will be at the driving range, paying for lessons, bribing officials – anything at all to try and get an edge,” he said.
But Malloch also issued a warning.
“Try anything, and you’re dead.”
NOTES
* When queried on the whereabouts of Sefiani Invitational patron, Natalie Gulbis, Malloch was evasive and declined to comment. * Tom Hann once again succeeded in driving to and from the event without incident. *
LEADERBOARD
Dylan Malloch 38pts
Anthony Sandrejko 29pts
Rod Jago 23pts
Tom Hann 22pts
Monday, March 12, 2012
Malloch seals inaugural Sefiani Invitational title
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| Hann, Sandrejko and Jago wait to tee off |
All it took was an eight foot putt.
On the final hole of the day, Dylan Malloch, 29, stepped up to sink the biggest putt of his career and wrap up the first Sefiani Invitational title with a round to play at Northbridge Golf Club.
“It’s a dream come true,” said Malloch.
It was just about the first thing that went right for Malloch on the back nine, who defied doctor’s orders to play despite suffering from flu-like symptoms. Commentators from around the globe have hailed Malloch’s bravery, drawing comparisons to other sporting greats who have overcome illness to succeed such as Jordan, Reed and Woods.
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| Jago fluffs a shot while Hann looks on in disgust |
“They made me work for it,” said Malloch. “My game left me a little on the back nine. Thankfully I’d managed to accrue a sizeable lead on the front nine, otherwise it could’ve been trouble.”
The final result from round three was a tie between Malloch and Sandrejko who finished on 5.5 points apiece. Jago was third with four points while Tom “Solo” Hann finished a dismal last with just three points.
It wasn’t until hole five that Malloch began to breakaway, following the destruction of Hann. The young professional had talked a tough game all week but once again crumbled when the spotlight shone upon him.
After the game Hann was very despondent and chose to lash out at reporters. A young intern from CNN suffered the full brunt of Hann’s wrath and was reduced to tears when Hann used a number of racial slurs to describe the reporter’s appearance.
Hann was later fined 40% of his winnings and has been ordered to undergo anger management counselling.
Hann’s agent later released a statement on behalf of the player, apologising for his behaviour.
Despite his irrational outburst, Hann stole the show on the par four 15th with a drive that echoed back to John Daly’s prime. He followed this with a glorious approach which landed within two metres from the cup. Unfortunately the pressure once again proved too much with Hann three putting to the cries of “fail” from spectators.
Perhaps the biggest revelation was the approach play of Sandrejko. Despite having next to no skill with the putter, Sandrejko’s iron play was a sight to behold. His tee shot on the par three 16th drew comparisons to Jack Nickalaus’s finest strokes.
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| Sandrejko teeing off on the par four 15th |
“I’d been practising all week with my irons,” said Sandrejko. “It paid off in the end. Just that f&*ken final hole. Dammit.”
Sandrejko clearly benefited the most from the afternoon tee time, which allowed him ample time to recover from yet another significant overnight drinking and pill-popping session.
One player who wasn’t able to capitalise on the later start was Jago, who failed to impress for the second tournament in a row.
It took Jago eight holes again to accrue even half a point. Despite this, it was Jago who managed to convert the only birdie of the day with a sizeable putt on the par three 17th.
“Where was that earlier???” Jago was heard to yell after sinking the putt; his frustration clearly evident.
Overall though it was Malloch who walked away smiling. With the round 4 tournament at Wentworth Falls now merely a formality, Malloch could be forgiven for taking things easy.
“Not on your life,” he told your correspondent. “Those muppets are going down.”
NOTES
* LPGA star Natalie Gulbis was expected to attend but pulled out at the last minute due to scheduling conflicts. * Commenting on Malloch's win, PGA star Bubba Watson said, "Who the hell is Dylan Malloch?" *
LEADERBOARD
Dylan Malloch 28pts
Anthony Sandrejko 21pts
Rod Jago 19pts
Tom Hann 16pts
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Malloch dominant in round 2 triumph
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| It was a glorious day at Wakehurst Golf Club |
Despite persistent struggles with the putter, Malloch was able to use his driver with devastating effect and emerged winner by 1.5 points over an inconsistent Tom Hann.
The final result saw Malloch finish with 7 points, Hann 5.5, Anthony Sandrejko 4 and Rod Jago a disappointing last with just 2.5 points.
Hann, who missed round 1 after crashing into a parked car, was a force to be reckoned with on the front 9, but faded when the going got tough under the weight of trash talk from Malloch and Jago.
“Jago wouldn’t shut up,” said a distressed Hann when speaking with reporters. “He was coming last but he just kept mouthing off. Tell him to keep his fat mouth shut.”
The key moment of the match came on hole 16, the signature 197 metre par 3 featuring the toughest water hazard of the day. While Hann, Jago and Sandrejko hacked their tee shots into the rough, Malloch was unfazed.
A glorious three iron carried the water and delicately struck the edge of the green. Malloch walked away with a par and put the final result out of reach.
Speaking with reporters after the round, Malloch dedicated his win to LPGA Tour star, Natalie Gulbis.
“Natalie called me before the game and offered some encouraging words. I was able to capitalise and hit some good shots. Of course it helped that the other guys combusted and couldn’t handle the pressure,” said Malloch.
When pushed further by paparazzi on the nature of his relationship with Gulbis, Malloch deflected any further questions. “We’re just friends,” he said.
The day started at a cracking pace with Hann unexpectedly winning the first hole thanks to a putting meltdown from Malloch, who missed two easy putts. Malloch turned things around on holes two and three though with solid points wins.
From there the day was an arm wrestle between Hann and Malloch with neither able to convincingly pull away. At the turn, Malloch and Hann were tied on 4 points.
“I thought I had him after the front 9,” said Hann. “The son-of-a-bi^&h pulled away though.”
The back nine saw the unexpected emergence of Sandrejko as a challenger, who once again started slowly due to a significant overnight drinking session. With four holes to go, Sandrejko looked menacing, particularly after a magnificent tee shot on the par 3 13th which landed just centimetres from the pin.
“I’ve really got to cut down the drinking, the tablets, the substance abuse, and the partying,” said Sandrejko. “Honestly mate, my mouth felt like the Sahara and my guts were churning like whipped cream.”
Jago, who refused to speak with reporters after the match, is rumoured to be a broken man. Sources close to Jago confirmed he was contemplating whether he would even show up for round three.
“He’s very disappointed in himself. In fact, I don’t know whether he’ll even be bothered getting out of bed tomorrow,” said the source.
Round three is at the fabled Northbridge Golf Club with Malloch holding a commanding tournament lead. Unsurprisingly, Malloch was looking forward to the next match.
“I’m thinking of giving the other guys a two point head start. Beating them so easily; I almost feel bad..... Almost,” he said.
NOTES
* Jago was scoreless until hole 8 before halving the hole to finally get on the board. * Hann managed to drive to and from the event without incident *
LEADERBOARD
Dylan Malloch 19pts
Rod Jago 13pts
Tom Hann 12pts
Anthony Sandrejko 12pts
Hann, who missed round 1 after crashing into a parked car, was a force to be reckoned with on the front 9, but faded when the going got tough under the weight of trash talk from Malloch and Jago.
Jago blasting out of the bunker
“Jago wouldn’t shut up,” said a distressed Hann when speaking with reporters. “He was coming last but he just kept mouthing off. Tell him to keep his fat mouth shut.”
The key moment of the match came on hole 16, the signature 197 metre par 3 featuring the toughest water hazard of the day. While Hann, Jago and Sandrejko hacked their tee shots into the rough, Malloch was unfazed.
A glorious three iron carried the water and delicately struck the edge of the green. Malloch walked away with a par and put the final result out of reach.
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| Natalie Gulbis was an unexpected no-show |
“Natalie called me before the game and offered some encouraging words. I was able to capitalise and hit some good shots. Of course it helped that the other guys combusted and couldn’t handle the pressure,” said Malloch.
When pushed further by paparazzi on the nature of his relationship with Gulbis, Malloch deflected any further questions. “We’re just friends,” he said.
The day started at a cracking pace with Hann unexpectedly winning the first hole thanks to a putting meltdown from Malloch, who missed two easy putts. Malloch turned things around on holes two and three though with solid points wins.
From there the day was an arm wrestle between Hann and Malloch with neither able to convincingly pull away. At the turn, Malloch and Hann were tied on 4 points.
“I thought I had him after the front 9,” said Hann. “The son-of-a-bi^&h pulled away though.”
Jago lines up a putt... and misses... by a mile
The back nine saw the unexpected emergence of Sandrejko as a challenger, who once again started slowly due to a significant overnight drinking session. With four holes to go, Sandrejko looked menacing, particularly after a magnificent tee shot on the par 3 13th which landed just centimetres from the pin.
“I’ve really got to cut down the drinking, the tablets, the substance abuse, and the partying,” said Sandrejko. “Honestly mate, my mouth felt like the Sahara and my guts were churning like whipped cream.”
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| Jago lining up a putt... which missed |
“He’s very disappointed in himself. In fact, I don’t know whether he’ll even be bothered getting out of bed tomorrow,” said the source.
Round three is at the fabled Northbridge Golf Club with Malloch holding a commanding tournament lead. Unsurprisingly, Malloch was looking forward to the next match.
“I’m thinking of giving the other guys a two point head start. Beating them so easily; I almost feel bad..... Almost,” he said.
NOTES
* Jago was scoreless until hole 8 before halving the hole to finally get on the board. * Hann managed to drive to and from the event without incident *
LEADERBOARD
Dylan Malloch 19pts
Rod Jago 13pts
Tom Hann 12pts
Anthony Sandrejko 12pts
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Photo finish to the opening round of the Sefiani Invitational
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| Lane Cove Country club provided a glorious setting to the opening tournament |
Despite being down by three points with five holes to go, Malloch unleashed a scintillating final few holes to tie the game with one hole to spare.
With everything on the line, the final hole fizzled for spectators as Anthony Sandrejko, who had been mired in mediocrity all morning thanks to a significant overnight drinking session, produced his best effort of the day to win the hole.
For Jago it was another case of ‘what might have been’ as he squandered a solid lead for the second tournament in a row.
Rod Jago teeing off on hole 13
"I don’t know what happened. I was playing well and just… I…” said Jago who broke down at the post-tournament press conference appearing visibly shaken.
“I want to say sorry to my fans. I know they expect better of me,” he concluded before being whisked away in a black Mercedes by an unnamed man.
Malloch, on the other hand, was all smiles, despite having to mount a comeback again.
“I need to capitalise better. I started well but in the middle holes I was playing like a Crowhurst. I realised on hole 14 though that I couldn’t let this happen; I simply could not let Jago win,” he said.
The 14th hole was, without a doubt, the turning point of the match. Malloch hacked a drive out of bounds and was on the verge of giving up. However, upon realising he had his back 9 mulligan still to use, Malloch changed his style from aggressive to tactical.
“All day I’d been trying to play aggressive, using my driver whenever I could. I finally realised consistency was the key, so I put my driver away and it paid dividends.”
Malloch proceeded to win three of the next four holes playing a form of golf normally seen on the PGA Tour with three pars and a bogey. His approach shot on hole 17 was close to the shot of the tournament.
Looking ahead to the next tournament at Wakehurst Golf Club, Malloch was confident.
“I’ve got the momentum. Jago fell away. Surely he’s got to be questioning his ability on the golf course.”
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| Jago was confident at the start of the day |
Sandrejko said he was also looking forward to the next tournament.
“I think I’ll drink less before round two, but I’m looking forward to Jago choking again. It’s high comedy,” he said.
Round two of the Sefiani Invitational is on Sunday, 4 March at Wakehurst Golf Club.
NOTES
* Tom Hann, the controversial Account Executive, was unable to participate due to a motor vehicle accident on the way to the course where he crashed into a stationary vehicle. He is listed as ‘questionable’ for round two *
LEADERBOARD
Dylan Malloch 9pts
Rod Jago 9pts
Anthony Sandrejko 6pts
Tom Hann 4pts
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Schedule and trophy unveiled
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| The Dave Crowhurst Cup |
Thanks to generous donations from companies including Malloch Inc, Hann-Corp, and Jago's House of Pancakes, the inaugural championship will be playing for the storied Dave Crowhurst Cup (pictured).
Competition spokesperson, Dylan Malloch, said he was looking forward to the four-pronged championship season, which will pit the very best in public relations golfers against one another.
"It's what every PR consultant dreams about - the chance to take on the best," said Malloch, speaking with reporters earlier this week.
Malloch is carrying a rich vein of form into next weekend's opening round, having won the FedEx Cup, the prologue to the Sefiani Invitational, last weekend.
"I was striking the ball pretty well. I had some nice up-and-downs, and the self-destruction of Rod Jago certainly helped my cause," said Malloch.
Sources close to key rival, Tom Hann, confirmed the young starlet had taken several lessons ahead of next week's opening round. According to Rod Jago though, the lessons were a costly mistake.
"Hann's got nuthin," said Jago, who was reached via satelite from Moore Park driving range.
Also announced this week was the opening round schedule for the championships. The players will travel across Australia's largest city playing on courses steeped in history.
"I'm looking forward to it," said Malloch. "Bring it on."
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